Had the urge to do something obscene?
Sometimes I'll be with a group of people, and a thought crosses my mind like, "what would happen if i did blah blah blah?" Blah blah blah being something totally obscene and socially unacceptable. It's not like I would ever actually consider doing these things, the ridiculous thoughts just come to mind. And I have no idea why, it's just distracting randomly. It's been happening with older people alot. Maybe they just agitate me.
On a not so separate note, I feel like my social skills have been deteriorating. I used to think I was pretty good at socializing, but the past few weeks have proven me to be quite incompetent. As always still stumbling through life. Hopefully I'm just in a weird funk right now. Always seems to be some kind of a funk though.
Seems like there's always something. No one's perfect though I guess.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Friday, June 25, 2010
untitled.
Wow. Again I have completely failed at this blog. I was considering deleting it, but that would be the easy way out. I figure that since it is summer, and I have a lot of free time, I could give it a try. And yes, it is summer. I let a lot of time pass since my last post. May 1st? It's only been about two months, but it feels like so much longer. It went quickly though. That's how this whole year went. It went by super quickly, but there was still soo much stuff that happened. I'm not really sure what the purpose of this blog is, because as of now, none of the posts related to each other at all. But I think it's important for me to continue this. I'll try to be better about it.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Committed.
Last week, I committed. I committed to the University of Oregon. I had wanted to go to Boston University, but I found out that it wasn't really possible. If I had gone to BU, I would have had ended up having to borrow around $90,000. And that's just like... not good at all. I was willing to take up the challenge, and live life like a vagabond, in Boston, because I felt like that's where I needed to go. But the risk would have been been too great. So I chose Oregon. I've been getting excited about it though. One of my best friends, Justin, is going there. So are a couple of other people I know. It's going to be a lot of fun. So, I'm happy. The only problem is that my girlfriend, Kaylyn, is going to be going to Brown next year. That's all the way in Rhode Island. 3,000 miles? That's tough. I'm willing to try and make it work though. Everything is going to be completely different in a few months, but I'm welcoming the change. I'm going to have a great time in Oregon. Go Ducks!
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Balance
Over my 17 years of life, I've noticed that I have an extremely poor sense of balance. I think contributes to the fact that, truthfully, I'm not very athletic. I wish I were lithe and graceful, but I'm not. And I don't have masterful control of my body. Many can attest to the fact that they have seen me lose my balance while standing. Although that may have to do with the fact that tend to fidget a lot. I can't really stand still. But anyways...
The kind of balance I'm talking about here, is between different aspects of my life. Specifically, the balance between my girlfriend and my friend. I guess its the age old argument of bros before hoes, chicks before dicks (or the other way around), whatever you want to say.In the best case scenario, I would want to be able to balance commitment to my girlfriend and to my friends perfectly, but unfortunately, like many things in life, this isn't best case scenario.
I think that I'm not too horrible at it, but I could be a lot better. For example, today was the panoramic picture for our school. I hung out with my friends today before school cause my girlfriend couldn't hang out. I wanted to be able to be nearby to both my girlfriend and my friends. Me and the guys got in line for the picture and my girlfriend like appeared out of thin air, but she was talking to a close guy friend of hers so I didn't really want to interrupt, but I said hi. Then I was talking to my friends and all of the sudden, she walked away with some people and I was just like, fuck.
I was kind of worried on the way to lining up and I was wondering if I should just book it to be next to my girlfriend, but that seemed not chill to bail on my friends so I just stayed there. Then I was worried that my girlfriend would get mad. I was texted her and I was like "sorry =(" but she was just like "?". I said for not sitting next to her for the pic. She said she didn't really care. Did I care that she didn't care? I don't know. At least that leaves me off the hook, but then I didn't really have to worry in the first place. But like, it would have been nice to sit with her.
That's just one specific example of having a difficult time balancing girlfriend time and homie time. It happens a lot at school. But I think it's truly unavoidable, so I'll just have to do my best.
The kind of balance I'm talking about here, is between different aspects of my life. Specifically, the balance between my girlfriend and my friend. I guess its the age old argument of bros before hoes, chicks before dicks (or the other way around), whatever you want to say.In the best case scenario, I would want to be able to balance commitment to my girlfriend and to my friends perfectly, but unfortunately, like many things in life, this isn't best case scenario.
I think that I'm not too horrible at it, but I could be a lot better. For example, today was the panoramic picture for our school. I hung out with my friends today before school cause my girlfriend couldn't hang out. I wanted to be able to be nearby to both my girlfriend and my friends. Me and the guys got in line for the picture and my girlfriend like appeared out of thin air, but she was talking to a close guy friend of hers so I didn't really want to interrupt, but I said hi. Then I was talking to my friends and all of the sudden, she walked away with some people and I was just like, fuck.
I was kind of worried on the way to lining up and I was wondering if I should just book it to be next to my girlfriend, but that seemed not chill to bail on my friends so I just stayed there. Then I was worried that my girlfriend would get mad. I was texted her and I was like "sorry =(" but she was just like "?". I said for not sitting next to her for the pic. She said she didn't really care. Did I care that she didn't care? I don't know. At least that leaves me off the hook, but then I didn't really have to worry in the first place. But like, it would have been nice to sit with her.
That's just one specific example of having a difficult time balancing girlfriend time and homie time. It happens a lot at school. But I think it's truly unavoidable, so I'll just have to do my best.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Boston: Day 4, Departure, and Overview.
Today was Boston University day. We got there early and took a tour of the the Communications building. They have some high-tech facilities. For the rest of the day there was the whole presentation of the College of Communications. I was pretty impressed. BU is really good for Communications and I feel like that is the school I should go to if I'm really serious about Communications.It still lacks the campus feel that I wanted in a school, but it makes for it in other ways. I mean, it is in the middle of a great city. Like literally there will always been something to do. I'll explain more about it in my college post.
After we left Boston University, we walked to our hotel room, then took the T to Newbury St., a street that was well-known for it's shopping. They had a bunch of places - Karmaloop, H&M, a comic store, The Fairy Shop, and Condom World - those were the most noticeable. Haha. I bought my girlfriend a love/friendship pendent from the Fairy Shop. The guy there wrapped it up and put flower buds in it and sprinkled it with fairy dust. Hopefully it brings her good luck or something. I don't know if I believe in those things, but then again I don't really know what I believe in. It could work, who knows.
Our last night was a good one. We went back to Fire and Ice, early this time, only to be greeted with an hour and a half wait. We decided, screw it, we have to wait for this, so we went out side to wait. My parents called and it was like a 10 minute phone conversation over I don't even know what. After that, we decided to wait in the bar. Some girl was having her bachelorette party there so we got really confused (and a little bit excited) as to what this restaurant was all about. We waited a really long time for the waitress at the bar to get to us. When she finally did, we got called up to our table. The restaurant was upstairs, and it was crazier than we had imagined.
Imagine a Mongol King mixed with a Benihana's but with like all kinds of food and dim lighting. Our waitress explained the restaurant and it was honestly soo crazy. Basically, you meat, any kind you want, either pasta, rice, or noodles, then vegetables and other toppings. Then they had like 20 different sauces to choose from. You could also make burgers and sandwiches. I feel like my explanation is not doing the restaurant justice, but believe me Fire and Ice, crazy, delicious restaurant.
After that we went home (the hotel) and hot tubbed for one last time. We packed up, got everything ready, and went to sleep. We had to wake up at 330 to catch a cab to get to the airport. When our plane boarded at 7, our flight was canceled because there was something wrong with the plane. Luckily, we were able to catch a flight about an hour later. We ended up having a 3 hour layover in Denver, but it was alright. Got home and was very happy to see my own bed.
I really enjoyed Boston. When I was a kid I took a trip to NYC and I discovered that I loved the city. When we first got to Boston, I was a little overwhelmed and I wasn't really sure if I liked the city that much anymore, but I realized that I had just become accustomed to a chill laid-back life. Once I got adjusted to being in Boston for a few days, I became a little more comfortable and I enjoyed it more. I think I would really like being in the city. It's more intense and exciting. If I went there for college, I think I would be more anxious than if I went somewhere else. I think I'm just anxious for college in general. Well college or not, I enjoyed my stay in Boston.
After we left Boston University, we walked to our hotel room, then took the T to Newbury St., a street that was well-known for it's shopping. They had a bunch of places - Karmaloop, H&M, a comic store, The Fairy Shop, and Condom World - those were the most noticeable. Haha. I bought my girlfriend a love/friendship pendent from the Fairy Shop. The guy there wrapped it up and put flower buds in it and sprinkled it with fairy dust. Hopefully it brings her good luck or something. I don't know if I believe in those things, but then again I don't really know what I believe in. It could work, who knows.
Our last night was a good one. We went back to Fire and Ice, early this time, only to be greeted with an hour and a half wait. We decided, screw it, we have to wait for this, so we went out side to wait. My parents called and it was like a 10 minute phone conversation over I don't even know what. After that, we decided to wait in the bar. Some girl was having her bachelorette party there so we got really confused (and a little bit excited) as to what this restaurant was all about. We waited a really long time for the waitress at the bar to get to us. When she finally did, we got called up to our table. The restaurant was upstairs, and it was crazier than we had imagined.
Imagine a Mongol King mixed with a Benihana's but with like all kinds of food and dim lighting. Our waitress explained the restaurant and it was honestly soo crazy. Basically, you meat, any kind you want, either pasta, rice, or noodles, then vegetables and other toppings. Then they had like 20 different sauces to choose from. You could also make burgers and sandwiches. I feel like my explanation is not doing the restaurant justice, but believe me Fire and Ice, crazy, delicious restaurant.
After that we went home (the hotel) and hot tubbed for one last time. We packed up, got everything ready, and went to sleep. We had to wake up at 330 to catch a cab to get to the airport. When our plane boarded at 7, our flight was canceled because there was something wrong with the plane. Luckily, we were able to catch a flight about an hour later. We ended up having a 3 hour layover in Denver, but it was alright. Got home and was very happy to see my own bed.
I really enjoyed Boston. When I was a kid I took a trip to NYC and I discovered that I loved the city. When we first got to Boston, I was a little overwhelmed and I wasn't really sure if I liked the city that much anymore, but I realized that I had just become accustomed to a chill laid-back life. Once I got adjusted to being in Boston for a few days, I became a little more comfortable and I enjoyed it more. I think I would really like being in the city. It's more intense and exciting. If I went there for college, I think I would be more anxious than if I went somewhere else. I think I'm just anxious for college in general. Well college or not, I enjoyed my stay in Boston.
Great Date
So I haven't had a nice little date in a while. Me and my girlfriend were supposed to hang out last night, but she had to cancel because she had to study for AP's. =[. Lame. AP's are basically screwing everything up. Especially my relaxation time - I can't chill at home without my mom nagging me about that stuff. Argh. Everyone just needs to chill.
But anyways, one of my friends is in fresno for his grandma's birthday, another was hanging out with a lady friend of his, and another was chilling with some of his other homies, so it was me and Justin flying solo.
He came over, we hit the bio, then we rolled on over to Islands. Sooo good. I had forgotten. Bacon cheeseburger with bbq sauce, mmmmmm, delicious. Then we went round 2 right before watching Kick-Ass. On our way into the show, we saw a few of our friends getting kicked out with like huge pizza boxes. They had snuck in but got caught so they got kicked out. High-key. Fortunately, they didn't get in trouble though.
Kick-Ass was a good movie. It was actually pretty crazy. I had a good time last night. It was a great date. Especially because it was organized so last minute. So I had a good night. Just wish I could have seen her.
But anyways, one of my friends is in fresno for his grandma's birthday, another was hanging out with a lady friend of his, and another was chilling with some of his other homies, so it was me and Justin flying solo.
He came over, we hit the bio, then we rolled on over to Islands. Sooo good. I had forgotten. Bacon cheeseburger with bbq sauce, mmmmmm, delicious. Then we went round 2 right before watching Kick-Ass. On our way into the show, we saw a few of our friends getting kicked out with like huge pizza boxes. They had snuck in but got caught so they got kicked out. High-key. Fortunately, they didn't get in trouble though.
Kick-Ass was a good movie. It was actually pretty crazy. I had a good time last night. It was a great date. Especially because it was organized so last minute. So I had a good night. Just wish I could have seen her.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Boston: Day 3
COLD. And RAINY. But I had my jacket so it was alright. Today was Boston College day. I didn't get accepted there, but my friend did. He didn't sign up for a tour so we decided to just show up at like 11, which was when the tour was supposed to start. The T ended up taking way longer then we thought it would so we got there around 11:25. It was a pretty long trek but we found the admissions office.
We saw this tour group in the courtyard and we low key latched on to the back and pretended like we were there the whole time. It worked and I thought that it was pretty funny. I think we caught the tour at it's later half because it ended not too long after we joined it. Afterward, we went into the admissions office. My friend got accepted into the honors program at BC, so he asked them about that. On our way off of campus we stopped in the book store. They have some pretty tight gear, clothing, hats, scarves, basically anything you can think of, decked out with the BC logo. Which actually I like a lot. I would say it's better than BU's but that would be disloyal.
On the way back to our hotel on the T, we got off early because we planned to walk to our hotel and shop along the way. Major fail. We definitely got lost and ended up somewhere in Chinatown. Boston's Chinatown isn't as legit as New York's or LA's but it wasn't bad. I bought this handmade little bag with a panda on it for my girlfriend from a vendor.
I worry if she likes the gifts I get her, but I hope she does. I mean even a guy with good taste could be subject to a bad gift every once in a while, and that's assuming I have good taste. I don't know. I think I will continue to get her things and if she doesn't like it, she can make jokes about it. I like jokes.
Anyways, we finally found our way back to our hotel. Chilled there for a little bit, then went to this place that this girl recommended, Fire and Ice. It looked super cool, but the wait was like an hour and thirty minutes and we were not down. We went to Cheesecake factory, but the wait was just as long, same thing with PF Changs. And we really wanted to hit up the hot tub. So we just said screw it, and ate at this food court place at our hotel. It was pretty good actually. Then we went to the hot tub and chillled. Good day.
We saw this tour group in the courtyard and we low key latched on to the back and pretended like we were there the whole time. It worked and I thought that it was pretty funny. I think we caught the tour at it's later half because it ended not too long after we joined it. Afterward, we went into the admissions office. My friend got accepted into the honors program at BC, so he asked them about that. On our way off of campus we stopped in the book store. They have some pretty tight gear, clothing, hats, scarves, basically anything you can think of, decked out with the BC logo. Which actually I like a lot. I would say it's better than BU's but that would be disloyal.
On the way back to our hotel on the T, we got off early because we planned to walk to our hotel and shop along the way. Major fail. We definitely got lost and ended up somewhere in Chinatown. Boston's Chinatown isn't as legit as New York's or LA's but it wasn't bad. I bought this handmade little bag with a panda on it for my girlfriend from a vendor.
I worry if she likes the gifts I get her, but I hope she does. I mean even a guy with good taste could be subject to a bad gift every once in a while, and that's assuming I have good taste. I don't know. I think I will continue to get her things and if she doesn't like it, she can make jokes about it. I like jokes.
Anyways, we finally found our way back to our hotel. Chilled there for a little bit, then went to this place that this girl recommended, Fire and Ice. It looked super cool, but the wait was like an hour and thirty minutes and we were not down. We went to Cheesecake factory, but the wait was just as long, same thing with PF Changs. And we really wanted to hit up the hot tub. So we just said screw it, and ate at this food court place at our hotel. It was pretty good actually. Then we went to the hot tub and chillled. Good day.
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